10 Things to Do When Your Car’s Battery Dies


1. Just find someone to jump it. That’s not that hard. Except when my friends and I found ourselves on the side of the road with a car that wouldn’t start last weekend, after attending the Festival of Colors, we did the dumb thing and didn’t ask someone to just jump the car, until almost two hours had passed…
2. Call someone. This one we did do, and they did send someone to come jump us. But unfortunately there was a whole bunch of traffic on the freeway or something, because it took them forever to get to us.
3. Get food. If you aren’t sure how long you’re going be sitting there, and everyone’s stomach’s are growling, it’s a good idea to find a nice little Mexican restaurant with fantastic bright orange and lime green walls and giant burritos. Plus if you happen to be covered in multicolored chalk like we were, they will have a bathroom where you can at least attempt to clean out your one purple nostril and one yellow nostril.
4. Walk around a little. This is especially lovely if you are stuck in a nice town with big parks and cute little snow cone shacks.
5. Get comfortable. This may involve stretching out across the back seat of the car. If you’re anything like Alex you’ll simply ignore the fact that Trestyn and Emma are sitting there as well. But if you’re going to sit in a car for a long amount of time without actually going anywhere, you may as well do it in comfort.
6. Sing songs. A surprising amount of entertainment can come from listening to two seniors try to sing “Mary had a little lamb” and similar songs in harmony. Especially when they don’t mind if their harmony sounds less like Bohemian Rhapsody and more like a dying duck. Not that they sounded like a dying duck, they were simply closer to that side of the scale, and they knew it.
7. Tell stories. You will have plenty to tell if your cousins are at all like Trestyn’s. Evidently there is a special Sasquatch mating call. And evidently Trestyn doesn’t actually want to mate with Bigfoot, because she refused to demonstrate it for us.
8. Have a tickle fight. Ours was extremely unfair, because it turned out that I was the ONLY ticklish one. Not cool.
9. Talk to random people. People get extremely social when they see a car full of pink, green, and orange people sitting on the side of the road in their immobile mobile. Seriously, random people would not stop talking to us. One kid asked if we were polygamist because there was one boy amongst us four girls, he was joking, but it was still weird. And Alex just had to reply with “Oh yeah, it’s more fun this way.” And one guy just stared at us, until we all started staring right back and he tried to look normal even though we kept staring. Every time we mentioned that we needed someone to jump us, the people talking to us said something about how they were sure we could find someone and then sped away the second the light turned green. That part was the most annoying.
10. Listen to comedy skits. We ended up listening to Tim Hawkins and laughing our heads off on the way home. Over an hour and a half later when we finally got the car started again. We all agreed it was quite an adventure.

So, if your car’s battery dies and you fail to ask someone right off to jump it, keep calm and turn it into an adventure.

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